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01.14.2007
I am pleased and
mildly apprehensive to present what I hope will be an ongoing Sunday
feature here on the Ludic Log: a brief mp3 blog, featuring seven
thematically linked songs and brief commentary on each. Today's
mini-mix is entitled HORNS OF SPASMOS,
featuring cruel and unusual trumpet solos; click to download
(.zip file).
TRACK 01: "The
Product", the Minutemen (from 1985's Buzz or Howl Under the
Influence of Heat EP).
Many years ago, a friend of mine made the observation about the late D.
Boon that from moment to moment, you couldn never tell if he was the
best guitarist in the world or the worst. His uniquely sloppy,
jagged, jazz-influenced punk guitars were a lot closer to great than to
lousy, but you can certainly see the point, and here, on one of the
terrific Buzz or Howl EP's
strongest songs, guest trumpeter Crane attempts to replicate the
technique on horns. "The Product" is anchored by a monster
bassline from Mike Watt beind a typically fractured guitar riff from
songwriter Boon, as a cruel, jumpy drumline from George Hurley adds the
chaos just enough to contrast D.'s excellent, angry lyrics about
commodified culture. It would be an outstanding track anyway, but
at 1:20, Crane's demented trumpet comes in just behind Boon's
passionate shouts, propelling the song from a fierce sociopolitical
rant into something like a spell of destruction conjured against the
whole of consumer society. It cuts out before the final verse,
generally allowing the most memorable part of the song to be Boon's
damning, let-it-all-come-down shoutdown of "the product of
capitalism!" But it's enough to remind you that not only were the
Minutemen the best band of their place and time, but were capable of
inspiring their collaborators to play up to their level.
TRACK 02: "March
6", Slant 6 (from 1993's Soda Pop Rip-Off anthology). Nearly forgotten
these days, Slant 6 was an early-'90s Dischord discovery, proto-riot
grrrl proteges of Minor Threat's Ian MacKaye. Though they had an
interesting, angular guitar sound and a couple of excellent songs
(including "What Kind of Monster Are You?", "Knights x 9" and "Poison
Arrows Shot at Heroes", all included on this collection of early
non-album material), and were easy on the eye, they never made much of
an impact and went their separate ways in 1995. This track,
little more than piss-take bonus track that acted as a sort of theme
song for the band, starts out with some sloppy, barely competent
drumming by Marge Marshall that seems to signal a complete
embarrassment until Myra Power's bass enters to lock it down a
bit. It would still be a throwaway track, though, if it weren't
for the fact that, 37 seconds in, Marshall pulls a trumpet out of who
knows where and delivers a meandering series of blats and murmurs
almost free-jazzy in their inappropriateness. It makes a
pointless song...well, still pointless, really, but memorable.
TRACK 03:
"Paralyzed", the Legendary Stardust Cowboy (original 1968 Mercury
Records single). One of the most bizarre songs ever
recorded, the Mercury single of the Ledge's signature song just has to
be the most bizarre song ever
to crack the Billboard charts. It starts with an off-key guitar
being plunked as Norman Odam makes a pitch for "good ol' Stardust
Bugles", which are the last recognizable words you will hear before he
starts into his trademark hollering, wailing, hooting, gargling and
bellowing. The Ledge honed his talents by taking his car to
drive-ins and standing on top of the roof, screeching to be heard over
the sound of the movie, and here, he must have been competing with a
doozy. After a crushing, manic drum solo, the trumpet comes in at
1:20 -- well, it's not even a trumpet, really. It's a good ol'
Stardust Bugle, and it sounds something that sounds like a cavalry
charge being played by a bugler who has already received multiple
gunshot wounds and doesn't expect to live to see the end of the final
note. Luckily, he recovers, and howls us on to victory.
TRACK 04: "Drunk
Trumpet", Kid Koala (from 2000's Carpal
Tunnel Syndrome album). Sino-Canadian turntablist
Eric "Kid Koala" San has a lot more in common with crate-digging
collage artistes like the Avalanches than he does finger-banging
thrashers like Mix Master Mike; he's more interested in creating
thematic soundscapes (like this album's fantastic "Fender Bender",
"Barhopper 1", and "A Night at the Nufonia") than showing off his
handskills. Still, he can occasionally rip shit up just to prove
he's capable, as he does on this showcase number: using a
technique he pioneered where he alternates dragging and pressing notes
under a needle for long periods so that they shudder and warp, he takes
an old Kid Ory-era jazz trumpet solo, and, with the help of the
crossfader, turns it into the sound of a fat sloppy drunk trying to
negotiate a winding set of stairs. By the end of the song,
there's so much pressure and flutter on the hapless horn from Kid
Koala's magic fingers that it sounds less like a recording of a musical
instrument than it does the purring of an obese, sleeping cat.
TRACK 05: "The
Urban Spaceman", the Bonzo Dog Band (from 1969's Urban Spaceman album.)Astonishingly, this
goofball-psychedelia from Neil Innes and his collaborators in the Bonzo
Dog Doo-Dah Band is the biggest chart hit from the Horns of Spasmos collection,
crushing even the top 200 powerhouse "Paralyzed". Its #5
peak may have had less to do with the British public's lust for gently
whimsical psychedelia than it did the fact that the song was produced
by Paul McCartney, who was pretty popular around that time. It's
actually a bit mild for a Bonzo Dog tune of the time -- a bit more
tuneful in a Beatlesy way (Innes was learning the lessons he'd one day
put to use in the Rutles), but not as clever or inventively satirical
as most of their contemporary work. You have to wait for the
trumpet -- I'm not sure what instrument that is carrying the main
melodic line, but it sounds like a flute into which someone has crudely
and unthinkingly jammed a kazoo. Bob Kerr's trumpet (or, excuse
me, the "hose trumpet") doesn't kick in until 2:08, after the weak
lyrical punchline has already been delivered, but it ends the song on a
surreally zany note funnier and more daring than the rest of the song.
TRACK 06:
"Movement I of Pini di Roma:
Pini de Borghese", Ottorini Respighi (composed 1924; from
1990's Dorati Conducts
Respighi album, feat. Antal Dorati conducting the Minneapolis
Symphony Orchestra). Laboring under the burden of
generations of brilliant Italian operatic composers, and living in the
shadow of the French Impressionists, composer Ottorino Respighi had a
lot of work to do when he began the second of his "Pines of Rome"
trilogy. He anticipated a hostile reaction to his tone poem from
the opera-loving, anti-modernist Italian public; "Let them boo," he is
reported to have said during rehearsals, "what do I care?" Boo
they did, most especially during a key moment at the end of this
lovely, energetic opening movement that seems to anticipate much of the
film music of the 1930s and 1940s. The bleating, atonal honk of
the trumpet near the very end may, indeed, have been designed to piss off the audience
and get their boos out of the way early; more than one critic has
described it as a "raspberry" in tone. Still, it served its
purpose; by the end of the performance, audiences were on their feet
cheering.
TRACK 07: "Out to
Lunch", Eric Dolphy (from 1964's Out
to Lunch album). When you're talking about
lurching, stabbing, blatting trumpetwork, it doesn't get any better
than this 12-minute title track from Eric Dolphy's finest album.
Starting out fairly normal, with a jaunty vibes riff and a loping main
melody over a stuttering drumline, it takes almost no time at all to
open up into something with enough space to get really weird -- and get
really weird it does, with Dolphy's sax sniffing around the corners of
strange time signatures and angular sounds that are almost unnerving in
their complexity. But it's not until the trumpet (played here by
Freddie Hubbard, a tremendous jazz horn player who was never as daring
and brilliant as when he was playing with Dolphy) shows up that things
get really bizarre. Around 3:15, Hubbard shows up, and within a
minute, he's jabbing and thrusting through the song as if he's trying
to poke holes in the whole edifice of jazz horns. A fantastic
performance from one of the best jazz records of all time.