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Inside: Cultural Sausage. ~ Ludic Lists. ~ Skullbucket. Outside: Hey, look at this! A shiny new Pindeldyboz. "big stinking log" "Rouge the Bat with a penis" "names of former presidents that start with O" "I can't I must I will Peter Cannon thunderbolt" "24 Hours by Louis Bromfield" "Department of Defense suggestion box" "giant Swedish weightlifter" "super crime girls in trouble press release how to" |
09.01.2004
MALKIN: Why don‘t people ask him more specific questions about the shrapnel in his leg? There are legitimate questions about whether or not it was a self-inflicted wound. MATTHEWS: What do you mean by self-inflicted? Are you saying he shot himself on purpose? Is that what you‘re saying? MALKIN: Some of the soldiers have made allegations that these were self-inflicted wounds. MATTHEWS: I have never heard anyone say he shot himself on purpose. MALKIN: Have you tried to ask—have you tried ask John Kerry these questions? MATTHEWS: If he shot himself on purpose? No. I have not asked him that. MALKIN: Don‘t you wonder? MATTHEWS: No, I don‘t. It‘s never occurred to me. (Michelle Malkin talking to Chris Matthews on Hardball, 08/19/2004) *** HASTERT: You know, I don't know where George Soros gets his money. I don't know where -- if it comes overseas or from drug groups or where it comes from. And I... WALLACE: Excuse me? HASTERT: Well, that's what he's been for a number of years -- George Soros has been for legalizing drugs in this country. So, I mean, he's got a lot of ancillary interests out there. WALLACE: You think he may be getting money from the drug cartel? HASTERT: I'm saying I don't know where groups -- could be people who support this type of thing. I'm saying we don't know. The fact is we don't know where this money comes from. (Speaker of the House Dennis Hastert talking to Chris Matthews on Sunday's FOX News Sunday, 08/29/2004) *** SLOAN: ...and so, obviously, I would question my opponent's qualification to even be a member of the city council, let alone lead it. MERRITT: Well, let's get into specifics. What is it about Ms. Trundell's service on the school board that makes you doubt her ability to govern at a higher level? SLOAN: John, Janet Trundell came out of nowhere to win an election against a very strong, well-funded incumbent. I think we need to ask ourselves, how did she prevail with such strong odds against her? You almost have to wonder if there's a hypno-wheel involved. MERRITT: I'm sorry, a what? SLOAN: It -- I mean, it doesn't necessarily have to be that sinister, or like a conspiracy or anything. It could be her parents' hypno-wheel, a family heirloom, something she got handed down to her over generations. But that doesn't excuse her using it to subvert the free will of voters and brainwash them into electing her. MERRITT: So are you accusing Janet Trundell of using a, a hypnotic device, a wheel, to... SLOAN: I never said 'wheel'. MERRITT: You said 'hypno-wheel'. SLOAN: No, no, I didn't John. MERRITT: I'm sure you did. We have it on tape. SLOAN: Well, 'wheel' and 'hypno-wheel' are not the same thing. It's a distinction. You're putting words in my mouth. One is a component of the other, and... MERRITT: Well, but, Mr. Sloan, to stay on topic, you're saying that your opponent won her previous government post by employing some kind of mind-control technology. SLOAN: I'm not saying that. I'm saying there are unanswered questions in this campaign. MERRITT: Unanswered -- SLOAN: There are unanswered questions. That's all I'm saying. MERRITT: Like what? SLOAN: Like whether or not she used a hypno-wheel to compel people to vote for her. MERRITT: All right. But, I mean, your basis for this is, you're basing the accusation on... SLOAN: I'm not making an accusation, John. I'm just saying, this is something that's out there. I don't personally believe it, myself. MERRITT: Oh, you don't? SLOAN: No. I don't know why a Martian would even need to use a hypno-wheel. MERRITT: A Martian? SLOAN: Not just Janet Trundell, of course. Any Martian. MERRITT: You're not saying that she's a Martian. SLOAN: Of course not. MERRITT: All right. Let's talk about parking revenues, because... SLOAN: Some people are saying it, though. MERRITT: Really? SLOAN: It's been said. There are accusations. MERRITT: By who? SLOAN: People. Not me. Just people. People are asking questions. MERRITT: What people, for example? SLOAN: Me. MERRITT: Ah. SLOAN: But also other people. Who aren't me. MERRITT: I don't suppose you can offer any evidence of this, uh, this claim. SLOAN: I don't need to prove anything, John. If anything, Janet Trundell is the one who needs to prove she isn't a Martian. MERRITT: So, about the parking revenues, I wanted to... SLOAN: Personally, I don't think she's a Martian at all. MERRITT: Fine. The plan proposed by... SLOAN: Because Martian culture frowns on pederasty. MERRITT: Are you...you're not...you aren't really claiming Ms. Trundell is a child molester. SLOAN: Of course not. MERRITT: I'm saying we don't know if she's a child molester or not. SLOAN: I think we're almost out of time, but I'd like to thank... MERRITT: I do think it's telling that she hasn't made a public statement that she isn't a child molester. Draw your own conclusions from that. |
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| TODAY'S DRIFTWOOD: "At 30 a man should know himself like the palm of his hand, know the exact number of his defects and qualities, know how far he can go, foretell his failures -- be what he is. And, above all, accept these things." (Albert Camus) |