"Don't vote for that fuckin' Bush!" (Bruce
Springsteen, 1988)
ADVENTURES IN REFERRAL:
a daily assortment of random
search engine queries leading people to the Ludic Log in the past 24
hours
"history of rap music"
"how to fight people"
"girls with no pants"
"teeth plaque conspiracy Metallica"
"what was the Chaldean diet?"
"Love Boat Veterans for Truth"
"Belasco gay art"
"the vanguard of democracy and freedom"
"penis humiliation audio"
"king cocks clip"
LUDIC LOG
11.01.2004
Say, readers! Can you spot which
moron is me? How about which one is you? I bet you can! And
don't forget to vote, for Pete's sake.
"I vote because I think I get
paid for it, like jury duty." "My vote is designed to piss
off my parents, assumed peer group, or some celebrity I don't like." "I don't know who I'm going to
vote for, because I have been living in a subterranean lake for
the last seventeen years." "There's an election?" "I think people who aren't
informed about the issues -- that is to say, people whose opinions are
at variance with my own -- shouldn't vote." "I have fetishized the
democratic process to such a ridiculous degree that I will be ashamed
if I don't vote. Which will make me feel pretty dumb if my
candidate doesn't win." "I'm voting for someone a
celebrity told me to vote for. Or possibly someone a celebrity
told me not to vote for." "Voting is a 'sacred duty' or
something." "I have 'principles' that
prevent me from voting." "I will not vote until this
country is ready to elect a Stalinist in a landslide." "I am somehow unable to
discern any difference whatsoever between the two candidates." "I'm voting based on what the
candidates may or may not have done 35 years ago in a war I may or may
not have supported." "I simply cannot be bothered
to take 15 minutes out of my busy day once every four years to go to
the polls." "You can't make me vote." "I'm 'cancelling out' someone
else's vote, somehow. That makes me feel like a big man." "I just like the cool
self-righteous feeling I get from voting." "I'm not voting because I
don't recognize the authority of the Zionist Occupational Government." "Voting is for pussies.
Like reading." "I can't vote, because there's
a concerted effort by the opposition party to disenfranchise me and
ensure that my affinity group's votes aren't counted. Also
because I never registered." "Hitler gained power in a free
election, you know. I'm not gonna take any heat for that shit."
TODAY'S DRIFTWOOD: "The surest way to get a thing in this life is to
be prepared for doing without it, to the exclusion even of hope."
(Jane Welsh Carlyle)