LUDIC LOG

How lame is it to forego a regular entry just because it's a holiday? Lame. How lame is it to sort of do an entry anyway, just in order to maintain your web presence on that holiday, but not a real entry that anyone would want to read? Very lame. How lame is it, when that holiday is Thanksgiving, to post a bunch of retarded links of things you're thankful for? Super ultra mega triple kitty lame. And yet, here we are.

Please stay tuned to the Ludic Log tomorrow for our regular broadcasting. And if you're one of the easily infuriated nerds who only reads this site on Thursdays because of the Comic Book Geeklopedia series, don't fret; it'll be here this time Friday, with only a slight delay. (If you absolutely can't wait, click on the "Use the Message Board" link down at the bottom of the page, go to the very first page of comments, and read my mini-recaps of some old Bizarro comics and a "Superheroes vs. Super-Gorillas" giant-size I picked up a long time ago. In the meantime -- and I apologize, but I've been cooking all day, and I'm drunk and exhausted and full of fatty food -- here's a brief announcement and some assorted shout-outs to people I'm thankful for.

First off, as I've mentioned elsewhere, I'm going to be on vacation from December 19th to December 30th, and am looking for guest columnists. If you'd like to take a shot at writing a fill-in entry during that time -- be it short humor, fiction, comic recaps, lists, links, or anything else you think can fill a page and a half or so of text -- please drop me a line and let me know, and we'll work out the details. Prizes will be awarded for all who qualify! I'm not just hot doggin' ya!

Second, here's some things I'm thankful for today.

1. I'm thankful that Jon Morris, Manning Krull, Maureen Fay, Austin Swinburn and Cori Faiella are all taking time out of their busy schedules to work on a super-special secret holiday project at my behest. This is an act of terrific generosity on their parts, particularly since they are doing it for a mere 100 jack shits apiece.

2. I'm thankful for having good friends like Lara, Jeff, Cori and Wayne to spend Thanksgiving with and practice my oft-idiosyncratic cooking skills on.

3. I'm thankful to have good editors like Jennifer, Anaheed and Hayden, who encourage and assist me and don't give me a bunch of hassle for ending sentences with prepositions like I did up there in #2.

4. I'm thankful for the good writers I know, who give me honest critiques and whose excellent work inspires me to ever-greater heights in an inevitably futile attempt to top them. In particular, it's nice to know other bloggers who update daily and who make an attempt to stand out from the crowd: so thanks to Claire Zulkey, Maud Newton and Christopher Monks, to name but a few.

5. I'm thankful for the people I know who make life worth waking up for every day, people who are not only good friends but who forever surprise me with their humor, intelligence and insight, and who always make me look forward to hearing from them or seeing them. Here I mention Christian and Christina, Michael, James, Kim, Michelle, Vanya, Rob & Robyn, Dave & Susan, Cori, Lara & Jeff, Tom, Allison, Claire & Steve, and Doug & Andrea in particular.

6. I'm thankful for my imaginary friends on various message bords, forums and mailing lists who have enriched my life in a variety of ways and who keep me from going bugfuck crazy at my boring job. I especially thank those who send me free things in the mail.

7. Speaking of getting free things in the mail, thanks loads to all the record companies, labels, studios and public relations firms who send me free CDs, DVDs and books, even when I have not asked for them and am not going to review them. You're my favorite suckers.

8. And as long as I'm on the naked self-interest trip, thanks from the bottom of my heart to everyone who has ever paid me money to write things. Boy, I sure do like getting paid to write things! So if you've ever paid me to write something, you are one of the finest human beings on earth, and if you've ever considered paying me to write something, you could someday be one of the finest people on earth yourself!

9. I'm thankful for the many -- well, not many, really, but certainly more than I ever expected or deserve -- beautiful and fascinating women who have inexplicably tolerated my sexual advances (you know who you are). I'm also thankful for the far, far greater number of women, from that girl at the comic book shop to Uma Thurman, who unknowingly tolerate my sexual advances. Remember: if it only happens in my imagination, ladies, you can't file a restraining order against me!

10. Last, but by no wise least, I am thankful for each and every one of you who read this humble web log. You could not be more dear to me. Unless you paid me money.

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!