Mother, may I sleep with Darger?.

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LUDIC LISTS

05.01.2004

FAILED FAST FOOD FRANCHISES

1. Kim Chee Korner

2. International House of Seaweed

3. Everything Fish Paste!

4. Ohara's Sun-Baked Sushi

5. Clamato Hut

BEST-FORGOTTEN DARTHS

1. Darth Goldfarb

2. Darth Hinky

3. Darth Al

4. Darth Cuddles

5. Darth Edsel

LITTLE-REMEMBERED MOVIE CATCHPHRASES

1. "You'll never live to see the other exit-chute of this abbatoir." (Terms of Endearment)

2. "That's one pissed-off honky." (Gentlemen Prefer Blondes)

3. "I could really use some firewater." (Billy Jack Goes to Washington)

4. "Hot as my colon, Spock." (Star Trek III)

5. "Why don't you cram it up your fucking cunt and smear it with hot mustard, bitch?" (Gone with the Wind)

FAVORITE PORN MOVIE DECLARATIONS

1. "Unh"

2. "Ooohhh"

3. "Mmmmm"

4. "Holy macaroni"

5. "Aaah"

BOY SCOUT FUNDRAISERS

1. Satan's Lucky Summoning Circle

2. Boy Scout "Cookies"

3. Sodomy Jamoboree

4. X-Tort-O brand Protection for Small Businesses

5. Do Anything You Want to a Cub Scout for a Twenty

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