LUDIC LISTS

DESCENDING ORDER OF PREFERENCE, #1

1. White girl with braids

2. White girl with dreadlocks

3. White guy with dreadlocks

4. Short white guy with dreadlocks

5. Short white guy with dreadlocks and a Rasta hat

DESCENDING ORDER OF PREFERENCE, #2

1. Suck a dick

2. Shuck a dick

3. S-H-U-C-K a D-I-C-K

4. Eat a dick

5. Eat my dick

DESCENDING ORDER OF PREFERENCE, #3

1. Lunch at Long John Silver

2. Lunch with Long John Silver

3. Lunch of Long John Silver

4. Breakfast at Long John Silver

5. Night janitor at Long John Silver

DESCENDING ORDER OF PREFERENCE, #4

1. Knife-wielding maniac

2. Knife-wielding manic depressive

3. Knife-wielding paranoid schizophrenic

4. Knife-wielding leper

5. Rusty chainsaw-wielding epileptic

DESCENDING ORDER OF PREFERENCE, #5

1. Trapped on a train with Rod Stewart

2. Trapped on a plane with Steve Perry

3. Trapped on a bus with Phil Collins

4. Trapped in a car with Peter Cetera

5. Trapped in Billy Joel with Celine Dion