On such a winter's day.


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LUDIC LISTS

11.13.2004

THE WORST EL SANTO MOVIES

1. El Santo contra Los Residentes Confusos de una Clínica de Reposo

2.  Las Batallas del Santo vs. el Neo-Keynesians Borracho

3.  El Santo y el Viejo Bastardo Sucio

4.  El Santo's que empeora Problema del Peso

5.  El Santo y los Pañales del Adulto

MYSTERIOUS AILMENTS

1.  Erin Gray's Disease

2.  Thumposis
 
3.  Operatic regurgitation

4.  The howling snufflies

5.  Juvenile-onset clinical stank

CULINARY SECRETS OF THE ANCIENT AZTECS

1.  The proper techniques for preparing, cooking and eating the freshly plucked heart of your enemies

2.  Basil, honey and lungs

3.  Soy-based human meat substitute for vegetarian cannibals

4.  A really good chicken nugget

5.  Learning the culinary secrets of the ancient Olmecs by eating their brains

UNDERREPRESENTED MINORITIES

1.  Hottentots

2.  African-Armenians

3.  Pottsylvanians

4.  Antarcticans

5.  Oompa-Loompas

WHAT THE KIDS ARE CALLING IT THESE DAYS

1.  Bible study

2.  Making the track team

3.  Glee club

4.  Extra-credit assignments

5.  Fucking

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